Something's Not Right 

by Cyan Wings

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CHAPTER 18


When Su Huailing had been dragged away, Emperor Jingren ordered the attendants to withdraw. Only he and the empress remained in the room.

The empress came over to him and asked, “How is Your Majesty planning to punish Su Huailing?”

Emperor Jingren shook his head in mild disbelief. “That woman’s ideas are truly curious. All the fault is hers alone, for her to bear on her own. If it really could be that way, we would also like to say, this realm is all ours, and we will bear it on our own.”

“The realm is yours, Your Majesty.” Gazing at the young emperor, who looked a little weary as he sat in his chair, the empress couldn’t resist putting her hands on his shoulders, massaging them with just the right degree of pressure.

There was a feeling of relaxation and limpness in his shoulders. Emperor Jingren let out a contented murmur and quietly closed his eyes. He continued, “Mmm…though the empire is mine, I can’t have the final word on everything. I can hope that the weather will be good in all four seasons, that the people will live safely and be happy in their work, that foreign nations will keep to themselves, that the courtiers will be honest and upright—but I can’t make any of that happen. At the same time, if a courtier does wrong, I can’t undertake the consequences alone. Even if she did everything herself, does it mean the guards did nothing wrong in being so lax? Her ideas are truly ridiculous.”

“Your Majesty is a wise ruler. Even though everything in the world can’t bend to your will, Your Majesty still does everything possible for the sake of the people and the realm. Your Majesty has so many pressing concerns every day. Do not waste your attention on a ridiculous person.” From his shoulders the empress moved downward, gently kneading his lower back.

“It doesn’t really matter that she has such ideas. Everyone has sometimes been naive. But Su Huailing has incredible good fortune. If this sort of person lacks understanding of the rules and misbehaves, it will be others who answer for it. From her account of it, neither the guards in the cold palace nor those in the hunting grounds neglected their duty, but they will still be punished because of her good luck. Sneaking into the hunting grounds didn’t implicate too many people, but what if one day she is overconfident enough to infiltrate a battlefield? What if one day someone uses her to spy on military secrets?” Frowning, Emperor Jingren said, “She is too fortunate, yet she cannot be killed. If she is imprisoned, she might still escape. What should be done about a person like that?”

“That decision can wait for another day. Today Your Majesty is tired. You should rest.” Looking at Emperor Jingren’s somewhat pale face, the empress couldn’t help saying, “If Your Majesty doesn’t go rest now, your subject wife will pick you up and carry you to bed.”

Her lips were close to Emperor Jingren’s ear, her voice low and husky. It went from his ear straight to his heart.

Emperor Jingren shot the empress a disgruntled look. “Don’t fool around just because you’re stronger, Jinyi. We did not say we weren’t going to rest.”

It was the slightest rebuke, without any heat.

The empress smiled and went with Emperor Jingren to the bedroom.

The temporary residence was built atop a hot spring. The rear courtyard of the bedroom contained a pool. Now that Emperor Jingren was at the temporary residence, especially after such an exhausting day, naturally he wanted to soak in the hot spring. When he finished his bath and went to soak, his hair loose and wet, Emperor Jingren looked expectantly at the empress.

This was an invitation to join him, but… The empress thought about it and said, “Your Majesty, this is a time of high alert. The temporary residence may not be safe. As a precaution against any sudden occurrences, I had better guard Your Majesty from outside the pool.”

Emperor Jingren nodded, disappointed. Taking off his clothes, he settled into the pool himself. The empress, meanwhile, in close-fitting fighting costume, sat beside the pool and poured Emperor Jingren a cup of wine. “The autumn nights are cold. Drink some wine to warm yourself, Your Majesty.”

Emperor Jingren took the cup and drank, but he didn’t finish it off. He looked thoughtfully at the remaining wine, then passed the cup to the empress and said, “You warm up too, Jinyi.”

Unperturbed, the empress took the wine cup and finished the rest of the wine in one gulp, putting her lips where Emperor Jingren’s had been. The night breeze blew over her, gently rustling her hair, which was bound up high. There was an inexpressible freedom and joy to all her movements that left Emperor Jingren slightly dazed.

The empress poured another cup of wine, drank some of it herself, then very disrespectfully offered the remnants of her wine to Emperor Jingren. “Your Majesty, have some more.”

For Emperor Jingren to offer another person the remnants of his wine was a great favor; but for someone else to ask the emperor to drink their leftover wine was a gesture of tremendous disrespect, even if that someone else was the empress. But not only did Emperor Jingren not reproach the empress, he took the wine and, imitating the empress’s earlier gestures, finished the wine in one gulp.

“Your Majesty holds your wine well.” The empress poured yet another cup. “Why don’t I drink with Your Majesty tonight, each one drinking half a cup, and we’ll see who gets drunk first? Of course, your subject wife will protect Your Majesty. Wine will not make me falter.”

The implication was that the empress was very confident that she could hold her wine, and it would be Emperor Jingren who fell down drunk in the end.

Emperor Jingren was a little vexed. He snatched back the wine cup and said, “It would be faster if we each drank one cup at a time instead of trading half cups.”

Then he made to drain the cup. But he had only swallowed half of it when the empress snatched the cup back and finished off the remaining wine.

“That won’t do. It’s harmful to drink quickly,” the empress said languidly. “Anyway, your subject wife wants to share a cup of wine with Your Majesty, for once play the calamitous beauty who intoxicates the ruler.”

This way of putting it not only dispelled Emperor Jingren’s anger, it also put him in an especially good mood. “You’re no wicked consort who brings disaster upon a nation. And anyway, the only one who can bring disaster upon a nation is its emperor. It has nothing to do with a woman whose life depends on the emperor’s favor. If the emperor didn’t give her the power, how could she bring disaster upon the nation?”

With these words, Emperor Jingren exonerated all the calamitous beauties in history. His eyes were clear, looking openly into the empress’s eyes, without equivocation.

“Your Majesty is wise,” the empress said wholeheartedly.

The two of them flirted awhile over the wine, then discussed affairs of state, of home, of the whole world. Emperor Jingren, growing increasingly intoxicated by the conversation, thought that with the empress’s great breadth of knowledge, it really was a bit of a waste that she was confined to the harem. Remembering the empress’s extraordinary display of skill earlier, the already tipsy Emperor Jingren raised the wine cup with one hand and took the empress’s hand with the other. “You’re so talented, Jinyi. What a pity!”

The empress had moved from sitting at the side of the pool to lying beside the emperor. There wasn’t a trace of drunkenness in her eyes. Instead she was gazing raptly at Emperor Jingren. “Does Your Majesty think it is difficult for a woman to achieve greatness?”

Emperor Jingren shook his head. “It has nothing to do with being a woman. In the past, when there were child emperors, the empress dowagers sat behind a screen to listen to affairs of state and direct the court, and they made decisions no worse than a man’s. We have never underestimated women. We only think that with your martial talents, you ought to be galloping across a battlefield, not confined to the palace.”

“It is the greatest possible honor to be the mother of the nation,” the empress said softly.

Emperor Jingren said nothing. He let go of the empress’s wrist, touched her face, and finished the wine in his cup.

“Having your companionship is the greatest possible honor for us,” said Emperor Jingren.

He passed the wine cup to the empress, who stared at the cup for a while, then shook her head and said, “I think it’s dull drinking like this.”

“Oh? Then how do you want to drink?” Emperor Jingren’s bare arm lay along the edge of the pool. He rested his head against his arm and looked up at the empress.

“Wait a moment, Your Majesty.” The empress put down the wine pitcher, rose, and went out.

Emperor Jingren waited awhile and began to feel dizzy. He knew he shouldn’t stay in the hot spring too long, so he quietly left the pool. Because he wanted to be alone with the empress, there were no maids or eunuchs on hand to attend him. Emperor Jingren carelessly dried himself off, took a light robe from a rack, and put it on.

The empress returned with two big jars of wine in hand and saw Emperor Jingren sitting in a reclining chair, clad in a white robe, wet hair spread out beside him, only half awake with his eyes closed.

The empress took a cloak from the rack and put it over Emperor Jingren. “Your Majesty, take care not to catch cold.”

Emperor Jingren opened his eyes and saw the empress carrying two jars of wine that were large enough to be vats. He was instantly wide awake. Pointing at the wine jars—vats?—he asked, “Do you mean for us to drink one of those each?”

“Of course not.” The empress smiled. She tapped a wine jar, and the seal flew off on its own.

The empress hefted the wine jar single-handed and began to drink exuberantly.

Emperor Jingren was taken aback.

This heroic style of drinking was beyond him.

But, sure enough, the empress had no intention of making Emperor Jingren drink from the jar. She set the jar down, leaned a hand on the reclining chair, bent down, and kissed Emperor Jingren.

Wine many times stronger than before poured into his mouth. Emperor Jingren’s eyes opened wide. He seized the empress’s shoulders.

This manner of drinking continued for a long time, till the two jars were both finished, and the empress didn’t seem drunk at all. But Emperor Jingren had been intoxicated after a few mouthfuls, and toward the end he could no longer distinguish whether there was wine in the empress’s kisses.

Emperor Jingren had an indistinct memory of being carried back to the bedroom in someone’s arms. He distantly felt that he was leaning against a broad, firm chest. He felt himself gently set down on the bed and tenderly kissed again and again.


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