It was late autumn. The temperature dropped and dropped.  

Su Qing, wrapped up in a dark grey trench coat, his sharp chin drawn into the turned-up collar, walked quickly through the intersection. 

He was a young man of twenty-three or -four, with a slender figure, pale skin, single eyelids, delicate features, and soft, shaggy hair that fell over his ears. It floated up when the wind blew, indistinctly revealing a pair of black stud earrings. Even with his head down, walking hurriedly along the street, his looks could make many girls turn their heads. 

Among those who knew Su Qing, some said he was useless, some said he was a pretty boy, and some said he was a sissy. There wasn’t a word of good in all these appraisals, but on the other hand, no one had ever said he wasn’t good-looking. Probably Heaven was fair—it gave one thing and took away another. When Su Qing’s turn came, he got nothing of virtue, intelligence, or strength—all the supernatural influence went into his face. 

His biography was also very simple—he had graduated from a second-rate university without earning a penny of scholarship or doing a single thing worth bragging about. It was anyone’s guess what he had learned, but at any rate he had muddled his way into a diploma. He hadn’t looked for work. He currently lived on the support of his man—oh, yes, we forgot to say, Su Qing was gay, already out. 

Because of this, his nouveau riche father had disowned him in a rage. Since then, Su Qing had gone from an idle rich kid to a pretty boy being kept by a man, living a contemptible life of sitting around doing nothing. 

If Guo Julin hadn’t suddenly called and invited him to dinner, Su Qing would probably have wasted away in his room. 

Guo Julin was his man, a young genius. He already ran a foreign trade company and was quite successful with it. He was doing pretty well for himself. He had a house, a car, and no wife. The only blemish on his life was keeping a brainless vase of a lover like Su Qing. 

This was a long story. By chance Guo Julin had run into Su Qing fooling around with a group of idle young men at a karaoke bar. He had been shaken on first sight, nearly blinded. His hormonal secretion levels had been instantly thrown off. So he had begun an operation to encircle and entrap Su Qing, putting all his arts into play, paring away his hard-earned gains at a discount, tossing out cash like tissue paper, exchanging a thousand pieces of gold for one smile. 

And Su Qing? As a standard wastrel of the modern era, there was no form of dissipation he wouldn’t stoop to, and he felt good about himself. Before, he had been open to men and women alike and hadn’t turned down those who danced attendance on him. Suddenly having this noble lover with more money than sense running after him, every word out of his mouth like Romeo’s, apparently unable to live without him, his whole world did the cha-cha-cha—Su Qing really did buy his act. 

When he came out at home, Su Qing had an earth-shaking dust-up with his father. His father, Su Chengde, had dropped out of school in his teens and gone into business for decades. He was quite a respectable figure. Who knew what sin he had committed in a past life to father a miserable piece of work like this? He only wished he could simply pick up a vegetable knife and resolve this problem handed down by history. 

Guo Julin had been really good then. He had dropped everything to keep him company. He had promised to support him in the future, to comfort him. He had even found time to take him out for drives. His TV melodrama male protagonist’s moves hadn’t declined one bit. If not for his age, Su Qing would simply have felt that Guo Julin was his real father. From then on, Su Qing had been dead set on Guo Julin. 

There is a certain type of person who likes to play the field, who won’t date with marriage as a presupposition, who often tosses out the phrase “just playing around.” This might be because he is especially shameless, but it might also be because, subconsciously, he takes emotions very seriously. Even if he isn’t willing to admit it himself, in his heart, a person who “isn’t playing” is different. 

As soon as he takes someone seriously, he’s dead set. 

But when it comes to feelings, who can tell? The course of Su Qing and Guo Julin’s relationship, from Guo Julin’s hundred and one favors to the Beauty Su’s budding feelings, to the pair’s burning passion and tender affection and from there to the gradual cooling of enthusiasm, and up to the present when this Guo character was harder to see than a head of state and Su Qing had to get in line to even make an appointment—in total, it had taken less than two years. 

Su Qing regretted not eating more instant noodles in university like his classmates; if his intake of preservatives hadn’t been insufficient, he wouldn’t have passed his best-by date so quickly. 

He got to the place and gave Guo Julin’s name. The hostess took him to a private room. The smell of sandalwood assaulted his nostrils. The young genius Comrade Guo Julin, dressed in a name brand suit, accessorized with a name brand briefcase and a name brand watch, was sitting there looking respectable. He nodded solemnly. He looked like he was worried people wouldn’t know he was especially rich. 

Guo Julin studied his face and said with in his usual mild and refined tones: “Look at yourself. Don’t you go out and get any sun? There isn’t a drop of color in your face. Come have a look at what you want to eat. Let’s fill you up.” 

All of a sudden, Su Qing had a bad feeling. He felt that Guo Julin was being so solicitous to soften him up before an attack. He took the menu in silence. Feeling nervous, he looked at it absent-mindedly. He must have been taking too long. Guo Julin waited a while, then raised his wrist and looked at his watch as though hinting something. But Su Qing’s willpower was strong. He wasn’t moved in the least. He looked ready to stare at the menu until next year. The genius Guo finally couldn’t resist speaking: “How about this? I’ll order you a bowl of bird’s nest soup with red dates for your health, and we’ll have a few simple dishes. It’s just the two of us, there’s no need to be extravagant. We’ll just have a bit of something.” 

Su Qing had no objections. He wasn’t the one paying anyway. 

Then Guo Julin once again condescended to a democratic enquiry: “Why don’t you have a look and see what you want to eat?” 

So Su Qing had to open up the menu again. But he hadn’t turned a single page before Guo Julin’s patience reached its limit. He gently but firmly took the menu from Su Qing’s hands. All smiles, he said, “Your stomach isn’t strong. Why don’t you have some vegetable dishes?” 

Su Qing at last understood that Guo Julin was only asking him out of politeness. He didn’t really mean to let him order. He thought, What can I say? He nodded to show that he would submit to the arrangements made for him. 

His look of going where the current took him displeased Guo Julin. He thought that, apart from being good-looking, this man really did not have a single redeeming feature. He had no views of his own even in little matters like eating and dressing. How had he ever fallen for him in the first place? 

The two of them, having nothing to say to each other, ate a sullen meal. During the meal, Guo Julin repeatedly exhibited the smooth and slick social skills that carried him through the business world. He pulled conversation topics out of nowhere, all of which were reduced to silence by Su Qing’s pointless and disinterested responses. 

Of course, when it came to highbrow or popular art forms, Su Qing really didn’t know how to respond. He could keep up with a conversation about eating, drinking, and making merry, clubbing and playing games, but watching Guo Julin spraying spit about his appreciation for the fetter-breaking ideas of Dadaism, he had only one sentence in mind, which attempted to break through the fetters of his tongue to slip out of his mouth—act like a prick and you’ll be struck by lightning. 

At last, Guo Julin could stand it no longer. He asked, “What have you been interested in lately? What do you normally do for fun?” 

Su Qing gave an “oh.” With his mind a blank, he considered, then summed up: “Nothing… Watching movies online, playing games when I have nothing else to do.” 

Guo Julin thought that he had found an in. “What movies do you watch? I have a good movie collection over at my place. You can take some to watch.” 

Su Qing suddenly felt his food lose its flavor. He ruminated unhappily—before, when this asshole Guo Julin had stayed with him, he had always called Su Qing’s place “our home” and his own apartment “outside.” Later it had turned into “our place” and “my apartment.” Even later, it had turned into the current awkward “your place” and “my place.” 

He felt resentful, but he also thought that it was really beneath his dignity as a grown man to quibble over terminology. He didn’t feel comfortable expressing it. So he absently said, “Action movies. Starts with fighting, then the fighting ends and the credits roll. Who knows what they’re about? I don’t remember anymore.” 

With these words, he swept away all Guo Julin’s interest in discussing cultural life with him. 

Guo Julin shut his mouth. He thought that there was no such thing as utter disappointment. There was only greater disappointment. He found that he was truly powerless. No matter what, he had nothing to say to this hollow pretty face. So he lowered his head in silence, took a deep breath, and decided to go straight to the main subject. 

“Su Qing.” He tossed aside his chopsticks and became stern. “Don’t you feel like…being with me is very dull, and you don’t even have anything to say to me?” 

Su Qing looked at his expression and felt a bit of panic. He forced it down and lowered his eyes expressionlessly. He began to race against the clock to mop up his food, because he had a premonition that soon he wouldn’t have the stomach for it. It was pretty expensive. It would be a bad thing to waste it. He also said perfunctorily, “No way, what are you talking about?” 

Guo Julin sighed. He really couldn’t stand seeing his indifference. “You’re always so… Ugh!” 

He lit a cigarette, looked at Su Qing, and launched into a lengthy speech: “You aren’t a child anymore. You ought to consider your own future. Think about it, in your current condition, you’re out of line with all of society. What are you going to do afterwards?” 

Su Qing was eating too fast. He choked and quickly picked up his tea to force the food down, thinking—there’s nothing to do. 

Guo Julin continued: “You still have a long life ahead of you. In the coming decades, how are you planning to live? You need some skills to rely on, don’t you? Are you really going to waste your youth like this? Ah, I’m the one at fault, I never should have let you…” 

Su Qing didn’t speak, letting him continue his amateur performance of the caring big brother rescuing a wayward youth. 

Guo Julin harped on for a long while. When he had smoked his cigarette down to the butt, he finally pinched it out and said in all earnestness, “You could stand to read some books. Why don’t you sign up for a training course, study a foreign language? I happen to have a friend in the industry. Do you still remember your university English? I think you…” 

Su Qing rubbed his stomach. He felt he was just about finished eating. He had always liked to linger over his meals. This time, he had finally eaten a meal at normal speed and felt that he couldn’t quite digest it. It was sticking in his chest, causing him pain. He sat up straight, drank some tea, and interrupted Guo Julin: “Don’t look at me. I paid someone to take my fourth year foreign language exam for me.—What are you trying to say? Don’t natter on about useless things, just get to the point.” 

Guo Julin’s speech came to a halt. The two of them looked at each other in silence for a while. Then he slowly exhaled and quietly said, “Su Qing, I think there’s really no point in us being together like this, really. Let’s break up.” 

Su Qing thought, OK, I’ve been waiting all evening, and here it finally is. He felt numb. He didn’t know what his own reaction was. He only slowly came up with, Oh, I’ve been dumped. 

All of a sudden, he felt exhausted. He didn’t want to ask why, and he didn’t want to know whether there was someone else. Their relationship had come to an end. They were both well aware of it. Su Qing was still in the mood to calmly say, “Fine, I understand. My apartment is yours, I’ll go move out.” 

“Su Qing!” Guo Julin looked bitter and grieved, as though he was the one who had been dumped. “Don’t say such hurtful things, I know…we’ve been together so many years, you’re sad, and I don’t feel any better than you do, but it just isn’t meant to be. Emotions can’t be controlled by reason.” 

“Yes, I understand.” Su Qing stared at the ashtray on the table and woodenly said, “No hard feelings. Should I snivel and cry and blame you? Thank you for the apartment, I’ll find somewhere to live and move out as soon as possible.” 

“Su…” 

Guo Julin was going to say something else, but Su Qing waved his hand and cut him off. He extended a hand and said, “Got a cigarette? Give me one.” 

Guo Julin silently pulled out a cigarette and passed it to him. Su Qing familiarly picked up the lighter on the table. Narrowing his eyes, he took a drag. He stood up and said to Guo Julin, “Enough, let’s end it here. Thank you for the meal.” 

Then he turned and left as though something was chasing him. He even left behind his trench coat. 

Why was he running? Su Qing didn’t know. He simply didn’t want to see Guo Julin again. It was as though if he didn’t see him, he could fool himself and not have to think about how he had been pathetically dumped. He ran out of the restaurant as though fleeing in a panic. He hopped into a taxi and gave a familiar address, then stared blankly out the window in silence.  

Half an hour later, he walked into a gay bar. Like a lost soul, he bought himself drinks—in fact, even if he hadn’t bought any, his mind still would have been empty, but after having something to drink, he was even more thoroughly witless. Then, just as intended, he became blind drunk and left in a daze with a man. 

A breakup, a bender, and a one-night stand—fine, this time he had a complete set. 

He never thought that real trouble would come out of his hook-up.